Home Ownership Dreams ~ Always a dream

For just a moment I thought I could buy a home. ME!  This 33 year old single working mother of one had a pretty good shot at buying her first home. It was such a wonderful feeling all 5 days of blissful, anxious, serendipitous feelings of home ownership… only to be crushed with one phone call.

My friend had given me a flyer about a BMR, “below market rate” purchase program in my hometown. I had never heard of this before and started to research all the details that went into it. There are new homes being built behind my parents property and turns out there was a block of homes in this development that were going to be sold below market! I could own a brand new 3-4 bedroom home for $240k in California!! NO WAY!!! I was getting my hopes up and knew to not invest any emotion into it, but couldn’t help myself. I walked through the model homes and imagined what my furniture would look like in the rooms. I let my son climb up and down the stairs and sit on one of the beds in the tailored bedrooms. He was smiling.

I was smiling…

After so much heart ache and worry and waiting for something good to happen I stumbled upon this opportunity and thought just for a moment this was my chance at happiness and the ability to care for my son on my own… No help.

But all good things seem to take a lot of work these days… Especially if you don’t have a lot of money.

I wish I didn’t need money. Dear GOD I wish that things worked differently in this world. That hard working middle Americans actually could afford to live and not just struggle to get by.

I know things could be worse… I know I have it better than a lot of people these days. I have a good job and steady income, health insurance for myself and my son. I have the ability to take time off if I need to and live close to my parents who help me every day. I’m very lucky. I just wish I could have a little slice of that dream… the one with the home and dog and cat… The pie cooking in the oven and my kids racing to the door to tell me all about their day. Sure maybe a man might be nice too, but for now I just want to focus on my son and doing whatever I can to make sure I give him everything he needs to live a happy life.